There are two kinds of people in this world. Those who have been married for years and those who haven’t.
I don’t know about you but I prefer to be the former. It makes me feel like I can do anything for my partner – even if it means doing something that I normally wouldn’t do. In fact, many times I find myself doing things that I don’t want to do just because I’m with him/her.
But why? Is there some deep, dark secret that we don’t talk about? Well, no not really. It’s actually pretty simple. We live in a society where most people tend to think that marriage is the only way to stay together forever. And since our parents were married, we all assume that we need to get married one day too.
That’s right. You can! You may be surprised to know that there is an alternative way to form a lasting relationship. Here are eight expert tips by Em on how to create a healthy and happy relationship:
1. Love yourself first
You should always love yourself first before thinking about someone else. If your partner doesn’t love you as much as you love him/her, then you shouldn’t expect him/her to change. That’s the main problem with so many relationships today. People are afraid of changing themselves because they don’t think they deserve it.
If you truly believe that you are a good person, then go ahead and love yourself first. Once you start loving yourself, you will naturally attract the same kind of people into your life. They will love you back and you will fall in love with them. Don’t forget that falling in love is also a process. So if you want to make sure that your relationship lasts long enough, you should focus more on the process than the end result.
2. Be honest and open
Honesty is one of the best ways to build trust in any relationship. But, being honest doesn’t necessarily mean telling everything. Sometimes it’s better to say nothing until you have to. When you have to come clean about things, you should be prepared to hear both good and bad news. Some people might think you’re crazy for keeping things private but if you want to keep your relationship strong, you should learn to deal with some tough issues.
3. Communicate effectively
Communication is very important in every relationship. No matter whether you’re in a serious or casual relationship, you need to be able to communicate effectively with others. Communication is a two-way street. Both parties need to speak up at the beginning and end of each conversation. This allows everyone to understand their partner’s point of view. There is almost no situation where communication fails.
4. Practice conflict resolution
Conflict resolution is a skill that anyone should master. Conflict arises when there is a difference between opinions. A lot of people are afraid of conflict and they try to avoid it whenever possible. But avoiding conflict won’t help. Instead, learning how to resolve conflicts will help strengthen your relationship. Conflicts usually arise due to misunderstandings or miscommunications. When these happen, it’s time to step up and take action.
Conflict resolution isn’t always easy. But if you want to make a lasting impression on your partner, you must practice resolving conflicts. It could save your relationship from getting worse.
5. Have fun
Have fun is probably one of the easiest advice to give in a relationship. It seems like such a simple thing to do but it’s often overlooked by couples. However, having fun does help improve your relationship. Fun creates happiness in both partners and gives meaning to each other’s lives. When you enjoy spending time with your partner, you automatically increase your chances of staying together for longer.
6. Make decisions together
Most people make decisions without considering the consequences. But making decisions is hard. When you make decisions alone, you tend to feel lost and confused. When you work together with your partner, you will both gain clarity and direction. When you share ideas and thoughts, you will find answers to difficult questions. Decision making is a very important part of every relationship but it’s especially important in a serious partnership.
7. Keep going after your dreams
We spend a large portion of our lives working towards our goals. We spend hours studying, training and preparing ourselves to reach the top of our profession. But what happens when we finally reach our goal? Do we stop working? Of course not. We continue to work towards furthering our career.
The same goes for relationships. Just because you reach your desired outcome doesn’t mean that you should abandon your hopes and dreams. Even though you’ve got what you wanted in your relationship, you should still strive to achieve new things. Doing so will ensure that you’re constantly growing as a couple.
8. Avoid toxic behavior
Toxic behavior has negative effects on relationships. People will eventually realize that their relationship is suffering because of the actions (or lack thereof) of one or both of the partners. Toxic behavior includes verbal abuse, physical violence, lying, cheating etc. These behaviors are harmful to your health and well-being. So, when you notice that your partner is exhibiting any of these traits, you must tell your partner that you’re unhappy with his/her behavior. The sooner you confront the issue, the faster you can solve it.